Return to Radiance with Danielle Venables
Underneath the layers of conditioning and societal expectations lies your true soul spark, begging to be set free. In this podcast, you'll find a mix of candid conversations, interviews and solo episodes designed to awaken and ignite the burning passion within you. This show is recorded with spiritual entrepreneurs, leaders and healers in mind as we cross through highly turbulent and challenging times and anchor in the new earth frequencies. This is a movement, and your call to rise up, own your soul purpose and embody the sovereignty and freedom that the world needs right now. Hosted by Danielle Venables.
Return to Radiance with Danielle Venables
099. Purpose and Passive Income: Finding Freedom Within the Trad Wife Lifestyle
Balancing tradition and ambition often feels impossible in today's world, where we're constantly told we must choose between career and family. My journey through this seemingly contradictory landscape revealed a truth I never expected to find: embracing my role as a traditional wife didn't mean abandoning my purpose and drive—it meant redefining them.
When I first stepped away from corporate life to be home with my children, I carried the hustle mentality with me, believing I needed to "retire my husband" to prove my worth. The results were predictable but painful: resentment building as dishes piled up while I worked tirelessly on a coaching business with inconsistent income. My husband couldn't understand why I was "working" all day without bringing in steady money or maintaining our home. I couldn't understand why my ambitions felt at odds with family harmony.
The wake-up call came with my third pregnancy, forcing me to face a difficult truth: something had to give. What began as grief over potentially abandoning my business transformed into profound clarity about what truly mattered. Surrendering to my identity as a homemaker wasn't about diminishing myself—it was about embracing a role that could bring peace when approached with intention and presence. Meanwhile, I discovered that my impact and income didn't require constant active work through coaching. Creating an Oracle deck allowed me to write during baby naps and quiet moments, building something valuable without sacrificing my presence at home.
What I've discovered is revolutionary yet simple: passive income streams can provide financial contribution and purpose without demanding the sacrifice of family harmony. By aiming for income sources that don't require constant attention, I've found the equilibrium that allows me to be deeply present at home while still feeling fulfilled professionally. This isn't about having it all at once—it's about creating sustainable systems that honor your highest priorities in each season.
Ready to explore how you might create your own version of this balance? The path to sovereignty within tradition is unique for each woman, but it begins with questioning the narrative that success requires constant hustle and sacrifice. Connect with me to discuss passive income possibilities that might support your own journey toward purposeful presence.
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I want to tell you some things today about my experience as a trad wife and figuring out exactly what that looks like for me and some of the nuances or even exceptions that I make for myself and my family so that we can all thrive and be successful and have purpose and have a role and not feel limited by our lifestyle. So if you are new here, hello welcome. My name is Danielle. I am an Oracle Deck author, radical birthkeeper, spiritual mentor, business coach and so much more, and I am coming at you today as sort of a follow-up. So in episode 96 of the Return to Radiance podcast, I shared about my transformation, of going back into my feminine, becoming a stay-at-home mom, learning how to follow my husband's lead and, overall, just this journey of submission, which is a word that's a very hot word in the trad wife or traditional wife or even conservative wife circle. As far as what does it mean to submit? What does it not? And that's not the topic of today. But as I've learned how to follow my husband's lead, how to be a submissive wife in the ways that feel aligned and in the ways that support our relational dynamic and our marriage dynamic, I've learned a lot about myself. And so, if you're interested in all of that, you can go back to episode 96 on the Return to Radiance podcast. It is here on my YouTube channel as well, if you're catching this on YouTube, and I want to kind of dive in today on redefining these traditional roles without sacrificing sovereignty, right? So a lot of the feminists that come into my world are like, yeah, but income, and yeah, but having an escape plan. And and yeah, but yeah, but right. Like all of these objections, and while, yes, I do think that in some circumstances it's, it is really important to have an escape plan, um, that's also something that is part of a bigger issue around feminine worthiness and the wounds that we carry and the traits that we look for in the men that we choose. Um, it is not a part of my story to be in an abusive relationship where I have needed to get out, whether that is financial abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse. Um, I have not had that experience, and I do feel like what we look for, in part rooted in what we were modeled as children and what we believe ourselves to be worthy of, that's like a bigger conversation that definitely needs to be had, and so I want to start this off by saying that in the trad wife world, as well as just marriage and relationships and philosophy on that in general, we do need to be looking at the root causes of why women are ending up in these situations. And just for any of you who are listening or where you're, like I am, in an abusive relationship, I just want you to know that there are resources out there. There are women's resource centers, there are women's shelters, there's all kinds of resources. So I'm going to just give you a gentle nudge If you are in a situation like that where you are feeling stuck, whether you are a trad wife or not, you can go and find those resources within your own community and get the help that you need, because you are worthy of so much more and you know that.
Speaker 1:So the topic, bringing it back to the topic of today's podcast episode, I really want to talk about my own career drive, because in episode 96, I talked about, you know, leaving corporate. I talked about stepping into my feminine, I talked about staying home with the kids and all of that is fine and dandy, but I still am a woman as much as I no longer tie my value to how much I achieve or how much I accomplish. Um, I still am a woman who has a deep sense of purpose, and I do want to work, I do want to contribute. I do want to not only contribute to my household finances but also contribute to the collective as a whole. Right, I feel like we all have unique purposes and impacts in the world that we're here to make, and I am not willing no matter what role I take on within the home, I was never willing to walk away from that sense of purpose, and so I'm kind of going to talk about that a little bit, and I'm also going to talk about the impact on our men at least, that I've observed in my own experience.
Speaker 1:So what was happening is, when I decided to be a stay-at-home mom, I decided to start my business. I was really in the hustle. I was trying to make it work, I was trying to make myself worthy. If you've been in the coaching industry, then you know that there's this wave of women who are I retired, my husband, and you know now he doesn't have to work, and you know, or he works in my business or he whatever right Like. But I did that and I'm the breadwinner and I'm the champion, right. And so there was a part of me for a while there that was believing that I needed to do that, that I needed to save him from his job that I needed. That's how I would know that I made. It was when from his job that I needed that's how I would know that I made. It was when I could retire.
Speaker 1:My husband and I have since obviously shifted my perspective on that, but the implications of that when I was in that mindset, um, were very much that I was spending way too much time in my business while other things were falling apart. Um, you know, I didn't identify as a trad wife, I didn't identify as even a housewife or even a stay at home mom, right, because I had these big dreams and aspirations and so I couldn't be bothered with that identity to be, like, reduced to a housewife, um, and so all of that sort of created this perfect storm where I was building my business and there were seasons where I was making good money and then there were seasons where I wasn't and things would kind of slow down or they'd hit a lull, or one of the contract positions that I held would fall through, or you know, whatever would happen and I would no longer be making as much money, but I would still be putting the same amount of hours Actually, if anything, I would be putting in more hours to try to recuperate that income into my coaching business, right? Um, and so the result of that, the result of of the striving, the result of the putting the effort in putting the time in not that effort is inherently bad, but it would get me tunnel visioned on a place where I was so focused on my business and so determined to like, quote, unquote, make it that other things would fall by the wayside. I would get so sucked into, you know, finishing building out a funnel, that I would not be as attentive of a mother as I would have liked. Or, you know, I would be choosing to work instead of doing the basics of taking care of the home right. Getting laundry done, cleaning the dishes, those kinds of things would get put off of, things would get put off and because of that, and because of the finances as well, not bringing in money when I was doing this right, because, like I said, I was working to make up for lost income. That combined with not fulfilling, I guess, my duty as a wife in the home.
Speaker 1:As much as that made me cringe, created some resentment in my relationship and he was not understanding my husband was not understanding why I could be home all day and not be making money and still be also not keeping up on the house, right? He's like why do I go to work for 12 hours a day? Um, and you know, you're here, you're telling me you're working, you're not bringing in money and the dishes aren't done when I get home from work. Right, and this isn't like some suppressive thing that he didn't want me to work on my business or that he didn't believe in me, but there was a very real thing happening there where he couldn't have, you know, piece. Right, if there's dishes in the sink, you immediately get stressed out. I know I do. You immediately get stressed out. And so he would get off of a hard day at work and you know the counter would be full of dishes that hadn't been done.
Speaker 1:Granted, we also didn't have a dishwasher at the time, so it was a lot more work, but you know that was starting to build some resentment and it was slow and it was gradual and he was really patient about it for the most part, but, um, you know it would get to certain points where he's like, why can't you just get the things done around the house that need to be done? And you know, working is not it's not a get out of jail free card Cause, even when I was working, like yes, I'm, I'm taking care of kids and I'm doing other things, but, um, even when I was working, you know I'm not working 12 hour days like him and I am working from home, so I don't have a commute and there's all of these other things. And so he just from his masculine side, was not understanding why I wasn't making money and I wasn't cleaning the house and the simplifying it down to that. Again, there's room for nuance there, but that was really creating like some friction there because he wasn't understanding even where my time was going or why I was doing what I was doing, um, so emotionally and energetically.
Speaker 1:That was like one of the costs of like the financial instability in my business at a few different points throughout my, my career as a coach. Um, and so I would find myself feeling conflicted between my career, my purpose, that thing that makes me feel alive and like I'm making a difference in the world, and my stay at home, mom duties, my duties to my family, my duties to my kids, my duty to my husband. Um, and again, I can feel some of you cringing as I'm saying that, but it is. It's a duty when, when we make the decision as mothers to stay home, we embody the role of taking care of the house. And that does not mean that our partners do not help. Um, my husband is amazing at helping out around the house. But same same conversation that I had with my husband when he's out of the house for 12 hours a day and I'm home and I'm, you know, using the kitchen and I'm I'm around and able to like see the mess all day and do something about it. If I'm not taking ownership of that, then like that's on me Right.
Speaker 1:And so I was feeling this conflict, but then also feeling like I had to work so hard to drive income into my business, to be successful, um to get the clients to sustain the income. Um, and even after I had sort of given up on retiring my husband, cause I realized that that's probably actually not what he would want anyway it got to a point where it was just not, it wasn't working, nothing was working. I was working so hard. I was sacrificing my values, I was sacrificing time with my kids, I was sacrificing peace in my relationship and peace in my own brain too, quite frankly, because, like I said, having dishes on the counter or walking around and seeing a mess that needs to be cleaned up, that, oh, I'll get to it later, I'll get to it later that starts to clutter your mental space as well. And so I was having to choose between the home or I was choosing. I wasn't having to choose, I was actively choosing between um being a homemaker, which is a part of my role, when my husband agreed that we would, you know, stay home, that I would stay home with the kids.
Speaker 1:Um, and what I felt like it gave my my life meaning and purpose, and that conflicting push and pull actually kept me stuck for a really long time in both my business and not getting things done around the house, because I so badly wanted the business to work that I was kind of being um blinded, or even choosing, just just deliberately choosing not to um sort of surrender to being a housewife. Right, like I was so against that identity, um that I was like repelling it to the point that I wasn't doing anything, like I was just like no, like that can get to it, I can get to that after my work day. And it was very like compartmentalized, which the more I sink into my feminine, the more I see how everything is is interconnected and and the ways that those dynamics play off of each other. But that was where I was at a few years ago, and so we had a bit of a come to Jesus moment when I got pregnant with my third and I was like, oh my gosh, like I'm going to have to give up my business. Like there's no way in heck I can raise three kids and take care of the house and take care of the animals and take care of, you know, everything else and tend to my business. Like there's no way I can do that. I'm going to have to give up my business.
Speaker 1:And I grieved for a while with that, and for those of you who have been following me for a long time, you know that over the last like couple of years, I did go quiet. I did take a step back. I was no longer launching any coaching based offers. I wasn't, um, you know, actively promoting, actively making content. I was serving the clients that I had throughout my pregnancy, um, but as soon as those came to an end, like I wasn't filling spaces for my services and I and I wasn't trying to because I truly thought that I could not have it all. And I think that there's a degree of truth to that, that like we can't have it all, um and everything is a choice right. And so we have to make the choice of like what's important to us and what's that split going to look like and what's the compromise and, um, like I said, for a long time, I was choosing my business and choosing my business and choosing my business, and I was putting it first, putting it above the well-being of my family, and I mean that sounds really dramatic when I say it. It really wasn't like that bad, but in essence, when you boil it down, that's what was happening.
Speaker 1:And getting pregnant with my third is really where that started to shift, where I was like, okay, I need to, I need to reevaluate this and I do need to improve in some areas. I do need to be a better wife, I do need to be better around the house, because with three kids running around and making messes, oh my God, y'all like I'm sure you know if you have kids, but it just it becomes a lot. And so if I wasn't intentionally embodying my role as a homemaker and as a stay at home mom, um, if I kept rejecting that, I knew that I would be on a path to like a full-fledged mental breakdown. Um, just from from the state of the house, right, because, like, nobody else is going to come save you, um, you know, I something had to change in me, and that literally had to be me surrendering to the identity that, while I am at home, while I am not paying people to clean my house or raise my kids which I don't want to do anyway then it's time for me to embrace that role. It's time for me to surrender and allow myself to be that.
Speaker 1:And that was really the beginning of the trad wife identity for me was stepping more into that and realizing that nourishing my family was enough. Gardening and, uh, making sourdough and those kinds of things like those were enough, and those were bringing me a sense of purpose when I stepped away from my coaching business for a while. And so, with all of that said, I did sacrifice pieces of my business and in that hiatus and in that space that I took, I got really clear on what was working, what wasn't working and how many hours a week I realistically wanted to be working on my business, and the answer was not that many. So what that meant then was that maybe, just maybe, coaching and healing and mentorship was not the bread and butter of my business anymore, and so I had to reinvent what my income streams could look like. I had to reinvent what I wanted to pour my time and attention and energy into and how much of it I was willing to do versus where I did just want to be present in the home and in the family and as a mother, and I'm talking about like a deep presence here. This isn't just like, of course I'm around I've always been around but I'm talking about like a deep, intentional presence as like the anchor of the family. Um, and so, with that, what I realized is a the Oracle deck that I said yes to a couple of years ago at this point, was 100% in the right direction.
Speaker 1:Um, you know, coming out with something I can write, I can be in my creative flow during the day. I can. I was, you know, writing while I was nursing my baby and, you know, napping with him, and things like that. Um, you know, it's all been very much on my own time. I can work on it after the kids go to bed, I can work on it, I can get interrupted and it's not a big deal. Um, where, like coaching calls and stuff, I obviously couldn't. And so there were pieces of that that's like, oh, this is sustainable.
Speaker 1:And so I look at, you know, now, with this deck launching and the possibility of future projects and all of that, I'm like, wow, like, maybe writing could be a really viable income stream for me. That is more passive because, yes, you have to write it and publish it and and um, promote it and sell it and all of those things, but there's also a lot of space in that. And so I realized that, wow, like, okay, maybe this is what was meant to be revealed to me all along. And then, more recently, I found another, more passive income stream where I can just do a little bit of work to set something up. I can, you know, show up to mentor a team and to, to share the opportunity with people, and then I can walk away from it and I don't need to be on coaching calls all the time and I don't need to um hustle and push, because it is a team effort and we are growing together, and so I'm supported from all sides in this, this new opportunity. So it also gets to be more passive, more collaborative, and I think that that's something that I've been missing.
Speaker 1:I've always wanted that collaboration, but I hadn't found it until now, and so both of these things just kind of illuminated to me that, oh, there is another way, and if I can make 50% of my income come from my passive sources or my more passive, semi-passive sources, then all of a sudden I don't need to dedicate hours and hours a day, um, between marketing and coaching and being on calls and being in Voxer with clients and those kinds of things. I still love to do it. My heart is still in it. While it's back in it, um, there was definitely a point where I kind of stepped away from the coaching industry, but, um, you know it, it it is still.
Speaker 1:I do believe in the transformation and I do believe in the magic and I do absolutely love to have those connections with people, but if I can take 50% of my income needs and allocate them somewhere else, something that is more passive, something that does give me the freedom and the lifestyle that I really want, then all of a sudden I don't feel like I need to work so hard to have purpose, to have impact, right, because that's really what it comes down to. It's not because we inherently need the money. I mean, everybody needs the money or would like the money, right? So obviously that's a factor. But my desire to be supported, my desire to bring in my own income, my desire to contribute in a way that allows my husband to just like let go of even 10% of the burden that he carries, because he does. He carries a burden for our family and I think every provider type masculine does Um, that's just part of of being in your masculine and being a provider is is shouldering the burden of, like, our survival, um.
Speaker 1:But if I can take even 10% of that away and without like taking it on myself, right, like if I, if I have systems in place in my business that bring in passive income, that just give us paychecks, that don't require me to spend hours a day in front of my computer, then why wouldn't I? Because it's not hurting anything, it's not neglecting, it's not creating neglect in my home and my family and creating that resentment that had built up prior, when I was really focused on my active streams of income, and instead it allows us to all just relax a little bit more, to have some money come in and support us without having to sacrifice the peaceful home and the homestead and quality time with the kids and being able to unplug for weeks and go on vacation with them and, you know, hopefully moving countries too, which is an episode for another day but all of these things are only made possible because I said yes to passive income streams right. I said yes to publishing an Oracle deck. I said yes to passive income streams right. I said yes to publishing an Oracle deck. I said yes to this new passive sovereign wealth income stream, and so if you want more details on that, if you want more information on what my passive streams look like, specifically what I'm calling sovereign wealth blueprint, um, let me know. Come connect with me, either in the comments or go to my website. You can go to daniellevenablescom slash freedom and you can have a look at it from there.
Speaker 1:But I'm really building sustainability, I'm building long-term growth and I think that's the biggest thing is with the coaching industry. I was so in my head about like the overnight success right, six figures in six months those types of headlines. I was like, well, if that's possible, I'm going to do it because I'm an achiever. And what I realized is that I was not willing to pay the price. I wasn't and I'm still not, and that's okay. That's why I fall into more of the trad wife category, as opposed to the go-getter high achiever.
Speaker 1:I mean, I still have those characteristics, I can still make things happen when I need to, but I'm not interested in being that anymore because I saw the price that it came at and I'm okay with being at peace. I'm not interested in being that anymore because I saw the price that it came at and I'm okay with being at peace. I'm okay with building slowly. I'm okay with sustainable, step-by-step processes that will ultimately take us to where we want to go in the long run, as opposed to sacrificing everything and burning out in the short term and also missing my kids burning out in the short term and also missing my kids growing up in the process.
Speaker 1:So these are just some of the reflections of where I came from and why I am the way that I am now and why I do lean trad wife, while also still believing that we all have a purpose, and if you feel called to share your message with the world, then that's a really important thing too, and that does not need to take a backseat necessarily to your family and your kids and your home, if you are, you know, staying home with your kids Um, it's all about finding the right balance, the right equilibrium within your own lifestyle, within your own desires, within your family system and what works for you, and that's really what I'm really passionate about helping women achieve right.
Speaker 1:It's like not only are we going to make your business feel super aligned and super easy to show up in in one capacity, like in your active streams, but we're also going to go into other systems, structures and options within your business to sustain you even when you're not on, because nobody wants to build a business. That is just golden handcuffs, or maybe they think they do, and then they get there and they have to burn it all down. I've seen that happen to way too many times to count in the coaching industry. So all of that to say. If you want more information on a passive, sovereign wealth income stream that you can start literally today, send me a message and we will chat about that, or visit daniellevenablescom. Slash freedom and I will catch you in the next episode. Bye for now.