079. Cultivating a Life You're In Love With as a New Paradigm Leader

Have you ever felt like your own success was a prison, locking you into an endless cycle of hustle and burnout? Join us on this enlightening episode of Return to Radiance as we unpack this common entrepreneurial trap and explore how summer can act as a vital reset button for your personal and professional life. We'll discuss the global shifts that are redefining success and leadership, and how you can align your business with your personal values and joy. It's time to embrace abundance not just financially, but emotionally and spiritually, creating a balanced and fulfilling life where your business serves you, not the other way around.

In another engaging segment, we dive deep into the twin challenges of visibility and worthiness that often hold us back. Discover how the fear of being seen and self-doubt can stifle your full self-expression, and learn strategies to overcome these barriers. We also examine how people-pleasing behaviors can limit your ability to receive abundance and new opportunities. By addressing these core wounds, you can realign your energy with your true aspirations, resulting in a ripple effect of fulfillment and success throughout your life. Tune in for actionable insights that will empower you to step into your full potential as a soulful CEO.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Welcome to Return to Radiance, the podcast with one core purpose to remind you of your innate power and essence. I'm your host, danielle Venables, an Akashic guide and soul coach, here to activate, heal and empower the new wave of soulful CEOs to become radically aligned and unapologetic. In these episodes, we will be diving into all things mystic, soul level transformation, the new paradigm of leadership, business, energetics, awakening, healing and more, as well as holding potent conversations around connecting deeply to your personal power and owning your truth. If you are here for it all, be sure to hit subscribe so you never miss an episode. While I'm confident the discussions in this podcast have the power to change your life, these episodes are for information only and are in no way a substitute for individual medical, legal or mental health advice.

Speaker 1: 1:01

Hello and welcome back to the Return to Radiance podcast. I hope that you are all having the most amazing summer, at least if you're in the Northern Hemisphere. I find that summer is very much a reset button for me and my business, and even my kids, you know, obviously, being off of school and having the kids home full time and prioritizing play and pleasure and gardening and all of the things that come with the warmer months of the year. So it has been a little more of my energy, I should say, has been in that realm, in the realm of being present with my family, enjoying the weather, creating memories, all of those other things that are really important to me that maybe we don't get to do quite as much when it's minus 40 Celsius outside in the wintertime here. So I apologize for any quietness, but again, it's just an intentional like reprioritization of where my energy and attention needs to be in the different seasons of life, which I think segues perfectly into the topic for today, which is relating to a magazine article, actually, that I just finished writing for Revealed Magazine, which will be coming out next month. I believe I'll be sure to keep you updated on that.

Speaker 1: 2:51

But the topic of the article that I submitted for this magazine was relating to cultivating a life that you truly love as a new paradigm leader, whether you're an entrepreneur or a career person, although specifically in entrepreneurship we have this freedom and this flexibility. In fact, if you started a business, you probably started it because you craved freedom and flexibility and sort of that more like free flow energy with your professional life, with your career, with when you're on and when you're off what you get to prioritize in your life. You want a total and complete control and freedom over that aspect of your life. That is why we start businesses more often than not. So with that, I find a lot of people and I've seen this countless times. I've had clients who have been, you know, six figure and multiple six figure entrepreneurs, um, who who come to me and they say, like you know, business is going great, money is going great, but I just feel like I can't take my foot off the gas or I feel like I can't step away.

Speaker 1: 3:58

Um, I've watched my own mentors go through that exact thing too, where there's been like this fear of, you know, stepping back and prioritizing themselves, or prioritizing their family, or enjoying their summer, and they've been afraid to prioritize what's really important to them because they're afraid that their financial stability will crumble or that their following will crumble, or that they're following will crumble, or you know, whatever metrics they're sort of measuring success by, or that we're taught as a collective to measure success by, those are the things that we fear losing. So, when we're building from a place of, like, focusing our, our target, focusing our success, focusing like what we define as success as meaning one specific thing and we hustle and we grind and we kind of get tunnel visioned on this outcome that we're looking for. What that will often result in is being trapped once you get the result. Feeling trapped in the reality that you've created. Um, because, yes, you're making the money, but you didn't make the money in the way that you wanted to live once you had the money, and that's a really like interesting sort of inversion to think about. But really it makes sense, like when you actually break it down. It makes sense Like everyone says, oh, you have to, you have to hustle, you have to, you know, work your butt off to make your first six figures. You have to, you know, sacrifice in order to make your first six figures.

Speaker 1: 5:45

And, while there may be some truth to it in those people's stories, um, as new paradigm leaders in this age of business, in this age of evolution on the planet, um, and things have been shifting really, really rapidly since probably 2019, 2020 or so, um, but in that, you know there's there's space to lead differently and I'm sure that you, if you're listening to this, you're aware of the global shifts that we're navigating at this point in history. You know, you can feel the shift. You can feel the ground rumbling, the foundation getting kind of wobbly. You can see sort of the crumbling of the old structures and with that is really an opportunity and I've said this time and time and time again it's an opportunity for us to rise as new paradigm leaders and define what that looks like.

Speaker 1: 6:48

What does it look like to lead a business? What does it look like to lead a family? What does it look like to step into your power in a different way? What does it look like to be abundant, not only in the financial realm, but also emotionally, spiritually? You know what does it mean to be rich with memories and connection and you know, prioritizing what's really important to you and really sort of aligning your vision to what that can be, what that is and what that gets to be, and making that conscious decision and no longer subscribing to the old mentality of, oh, I have to grind, I have to sacrifice myself, and once I get there, then I can relax. You know, once I achieve something, once I work hard and make something of myself, then I can relax Because, like I said, the reality is, if you build that way, you're going to be terrified to take your foot off.

Speaker 1: 7:43

Reality is, if you build that way, you're going to be terrified to take your foot off the gas when you get there, you're going to be terrified to take that step back and to take that space that you want in your life. So if you can build in a way that is maybe a little bit slower but a lot steadier, of a foundation that allows you to be present in your life every step of the way, to prioritize what's important to you every step of the way and I'm not bringing that business into facet that's important to you because it should be, otherwise you're probably in the wrong industry. Um, but it's about more than that, because you're more than that one single facet, that one single dimension of your life. You're a multi-dimensional human. You have, you know, relationships that you care about, you have kids that you care about. Maybe you have, you know, a social life and friends and travel and all of these other experiences. You have your own, like seasons of going inward and personal transformation, personal evolution.

Speaker 1: 8:48

There's catastrophe that happens in life where suddenly you need to be available for another aspect of your life and so we need to be able to build and hold all of it, not just business. So when we stop being tunnel visioned on just business and we start to look at the bigger picture and take that step back and zoom out and say, okay, what do I want my life as a whole to look like, that's when you start to innovate, that's when you stop subscribing to the ideas of other people that they've planted or that they've, you know, spread through the collective of like. You have to show up this way or you have to do this. You have to do that to be successful and you get to click that unsubscribe button on those things and start to come back to the truth of your soul, the truth of what you're building, the truth of what you really want to experience, because there's more to life than business. And that was one hell of an intro. I'm just going to take a quick sip of water. We have a ton of smoke in the air here today, so I'm trying to not cough everywhere for you, okay.

Speaker 1: 10:05

So, moving forward in this, what, where do we start like, what do you do to get from this old conditioning that you've maybe been operating on and and pull it back to this is what I want? I'm going to do what I want, and the first step with that is to notice where you have been striving, where you have been pushing, where you have been tunnel vision. What have you been subscribed to in your ambition and is it truly aligned? Yes or no, and some of it might be, you know there's, there's going to be, aspects of everything. I don't believe that any one of us is out there doing things that are completely misaligned and way off target or anything like that, but the way that you're building, or the way that you're showing up or the way that it's panned out, maybe you unconsciously built this way and now you're like I'm not actually satisfied with how this is going.

Speaker 1: 11:07

So pay attention to where things aren't hitting it for you, aren't doing it for you, and then, once you found those things, I want you to just take a minute to release the shame. There is no shame that you have done what you've done up to this point. There's no shame that you have built the way that you built. There's no shame that you have achieved what you've achieved the way that you've achieved it. Every single thing that you have done up to this point has led you to this exact moment in time. It has led you to this time and space where you get to have the realization that, hey, actually I want something else and you get to give yourself that permission slip to shift things and to do it differently and to go after something else. Um, just because you're worthy of that, you get to shift and pivot and change your trajectory at any point. That is part of the beauty of life. So we're going to release any shame that we have around doing things that maybe weren't fully in integrity or weren't fully in alignment. We're going to release all of that because you don't need to carry that shit anymore.

Speaker 1: 12:18

Next, you're going to release the pressure. Where have you been putting pressure on yourself to achieve a certain outcome, to hit a certain income level, to you know work to a certain point, or to gain a certain recognition? Where have you been sort of placing pressure, striving in a way that doesn't feel like flowy and fun that's just like I can rest when and like putting that pressure on yourself. Pay attention to that. Can you release the pressure that you need to make something of yourself, that you need to prove yourself, that you need to make a certain income to be worthy, that you need to help a certain number of clients to be worthy, that you need to make a certain income to be worthy, that you need to help a certain number of clients to be worthy, that you need to have a certain offer, suite or business structure, like you've seen online or you know whatever. You don't need any of that. So can you allow yourself to release the pressure to look or act or show up or be a certain way? Just let it go a certain way. Just let it go.

Speaker 1: 13:31

And then I want you to be really conscious about making space for your soul. I want you to take space to nourish yourself, to put your feet in the grass, to sit outside in the sun, to float in your pool, to do whatever it is that makes you feel calm, at peace, connected to yourself, you know, not distracted by the millions of things that you have on your to-do list, not all the things that you should be doing in order to get the sale. Just letting yourself be and inviting your soul to come forward, inviting your soul to come deeper into your body and to make its presence known just that little bit more. And if you set aside that intention every single day, if you commit to that intention every single day, even every second day, but let's aim for every day. All of a sudden, new doors start to open, new paths start to appear. New business structures, ideas, programs, offers, all those things start to come up. But it's only once you've released that pressure. If you sit down and you're still putting pressure on yourself to get an outcome and you're like dear soul, please help me channel my next offer that's going to make me a million dollars.

Speaker 1: 14:49

That's a very different energy than to be light and guided and nourished and allow things to emerge for your next step right. It's like frantically searching for the next step versus allowing the next step to reveal itself to you. And again, it's not just some passive thing where you just you know, sit around with your hoodie up over your head and hope that somewhere in scrolling through Instagram you're going to find your next step. That's not it at all. It does take that conscious effort, that conscious action of taking space for yourself, nourishing yourself, being with your soul. But it doesn't have to be a hustle, it doesn't have to be production based, right? What if it got to be flowy and easy and you're just taking care of you and nurturing yourself, nurturing your family, and the answers started to reveal themselves. So that's the basic framework and it's it's that fucking simple and yet it's the simplest things that require the most work, that require the most mastery because they're so simple. So it sounds like, oh, like I, I can do whatever, whatever, Like I know that I'm beyond that, but really it comes down to returning to the fundamentals, returning to that like foundational work that is going to allow you to come more into, like what it really is that you're here to do and share and receive and experience in this lifetime.

Speaker 1: 16:28

So there are a few things that sort of underlie, like where we're putting pressure on ourselves or why we're putting pressure on ourselves, um, certain things that stop us from really taking ownership of what it is that we want, what it is that we want what it is we truly believe in, what it is we truly think is possible, our real vision, like that bigger, larger than life vision that we have, all of those things. There are certain blocks, there are certain factors that keep us sort of hiding from that, and I'm going to go through a couple. It's, um, there's a very like extensive list, but I'm going to just kind of narrow it down to a couple of broad ones that I find impact business, um, but that also just impact the way that you live your life right, because everything's connected, and so I'm speaking of this through a business standpoint. But really, this is a, this is a personal decision, this is a personal like frequency to attune to, um, that will allow you to have that ripple through your entire life. You know that, that satisfaction, that fulfillment, that success that you're desiring, all of those things that then open the door to more abundance, that open the door to new opportunities and success and recognition and whatever else it is that you've been seeking, this foundational stuff is really the doorway to that.

Speaker 1: 18:01

So the first block that I see a lot is visibility. There's this fear of being seen, there's this fear of taking up space. There is, you know, what I have to say isn't important enough, I don't know enough, I'm not good enough, Um, you know why would people listen to me? Why me, like all of these things that play out in the unconscious layers of your energy body, of your emotional body, um, and even that gets stored at the level of the physical body, and when we're afraid of being visible and not just outwardly visible, like there's, like you know, standing up on stage and speaking, obviously that is like getting visible. There's speaking on social media, that is getting visible, um, but I'm talking about even being seen in your truest essence, without shying away, like within your day-to-day life.

Speaker 1: 18:56

You know whether that's receiving a compliment from somebody, whether that is um being seen in your vulnerability by your partner, and I know some of you out there have these walls up where you don't want to be fully witnessed in the depth of your emotion or in the depth of your complexity by your partner, and so all of these layers of visibility are kind of like shielding. So, no matter how much you want to be fully expressed, no matter how much you want to show up and share your message, share your offer, sell the things you know, share your vision for the world, whatever else, there are filters that you're still placing in front of yourself, like an overlay between you and your audience, and it's like hazy, it's hazing their view of you. Um, simply because you have these fundamental, energetic things sitting there that are informing you that it's not safe to be fully seen. It's not safe to be seen in your vulnerability, in your authenticity, um, you, and it's true, like it sets you up for rejection, judgment, um, you know all kinds of backlash potentially, especially online. It can be a scary space out there. So it's it's not unfounded, but it's important to be aware of the visibility blocks and what's stopping us from taking up space and being seen, because that's going to directly impact the potency of your message, the potency of what it is that you say when you do show up, the way that it lands with people when you do show up and speak. All of that is impacted by your willingness to get visible, is impacted by your willingness to get visible.

Speaker 1: 20:47

The next one is worthiness, and this is a core wound for a lot of people, especially a lot of women, and the worthiness block or the worthiness wound comes through in a way that can be people pleasing, being overly accommodating, um, overgiving, like sort of self-sacrificing type of patterns. And it can also look like I need to work and get my work done before I can go play, you know. So on a nice hot summer day when all you really want is to, like, sit outside in the sun, it can look like I need to clean the house first, I need to email my email list, I need to make my Instagram posts, I need to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Here's this long to do list, and once I've done all of those things, then I can go sit outside and enjoy the sunshine.

Speaker 1: 21:40

And that lack of indulging your desires is a symptom of unworthiness. And I'm not saying that you never have to do things that you don't feel like doing, but what I am pointing out is where there's an absence of like fulfilling your own desires or where it gets put last on the priority list, those are all rooted in the worthiness wound. So with that you know, it's easy to see where maybe we're not being receptive to anything. Right, if we're not even allowing ourselves to receive the sunshine on a nice day, for example. And like this is a really like, maybe drastic example for some of you, but I know that some of you are probably living in that exact reality right now, where it's like oh, I really wanted to get outside, but now it's, you know, four o'clock and I need to cook dinner.

Speaker 1: 22:45

You know, like when we're not even allowing ourselves to receive that little bit of nourishment that we're desiring throughout our day because we've got other priorities, because we have a family to take care of and a business to take care of and clients to take care of, and you know all all these other obligations. Um, our energy is not receptive, it's not open, it's not ready to receive from outside sources either. So we're not receptive to that spontaneous client that came without us having to, you know, post five times on Facebook that day. We're not open to money just coming into our bank account unless it was already, like, planned or strategized or earned or you know whatever, like we're not open to miracles, we're not open to the flow of life, because we believe that we have to work and give and hustle and overgive and over-accommodate in order to receive things in return. And that's a very depleting energy to be in, because you're giving and giving, and giving and giving, and when you're not pausing and receiving, there's no room for those things to actually come into your life.

Speaker 1: 24:03

And the last one that I'm going to touch on here is relating to fear, and fear can take so many different forms. It's actually kind of like woven into the other two as well. But, um, you know, fear is, is everything. It's, it's your resistance to everything. There's fear of discomfort, there's fear of the unknown, there's fear of getting what you want and then losing it all. There's fear of being rejected. There's fear of judgment there's.

Speaker 1: 24:32

You know there's countless types of fear that you will encounter, especially as an entrepreneur, when you're putting yourself out there, when you have bills to pay and maybe you won't get what you really want. You know, there's the fear of naming and being witnessed in the bigness of your vision, the bigness of your work, of your impact, and still not being received the way that you want it to be received and not belonging Like. There are so many unconscious fears that we carry and, honestly, it's impossible to even identify them all, nevermind to eradicate them all. So fear is one of those things that we kind of have to learn how to work with. But at the same time, when we can bring some of those into our awareness and work with them instead of against them and, you know, get curious about them and move towards them, you're able to transmute some of that and even sort of push the envelope on some of those fears and see how far can you go into that fear, you know, and and how okay can you be if that, if what you fear, happens right. So there, there's magic in that little shadow um, big shadow, depending but there's magic in there that, when you're willing to acknowledge it, and that's the biggest thing is you need to acknowledge these blocks. You need to acknowledge that they're there and you need to be willing to work with them, to hear them, to hold space for them. And if you're like, I don't know how to do that, or I've tried to do that, or I've, like, conceptually done that, I've, you know, journaled, I've meditated and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah and they're still there. Um, the Akashic records are a really, really beautiful tool to bring you into your heart, to bring you into your body and actually allow you to feel and process and release a lot of those things, so you can get in touch about working together in that way. If that is what you're feeling is the next step for you.

Speaker 1: 26:48

But, really, like, moving through those fears is the only thing you know. Bringing them from the unconscious to the conscious and then transmuting them is really the only way to not allow them to like sabotage you in some way. Right, like there's always going to be some degree of that. There's always going to be some degree of fear holding you back. But if you feel like you're really restrained, really like just almost being suffocated by the thought of going any bigger than you already have. If you're like sort of hitting that upper limit in terms of like no, I've already, I've, I've pushed my comfort zone up to this point, like this is where we stop for now, um, and you can't seem to like break through that glass ceiling, um, that's where maybe having somebody hold space for you to process those things is going to be really, really beneficial, because, again, having some fear totally normal, allowing fear to hold you back or, you know, not even necessarily being aware, but just holding yourself back and maybe not knowing entirely why or how or what fear is actually like present Um, that is not the way that you have to live.

Speaker 1: 28:06

And yes, of course there's the saying of like do it scared, and that's true. But doing it scared is doing it when you're aware of the fear, when you're facing the fear and you know that it's scary, and you're looking at the face and you're like I'm going to do it anyway. But when there's all this undercurrent stuff that's kind of dragging you down, that's like dense and heavy and hard, um, it's not as easy as just doing it scared, cause you don't even know necessarily what you're afraid of. And so that's really where the power of mentorship and space, holding and working with the Akasha and all of those things comes into play because it allows you to transmute a whole bunch of that all at once. It allows you to bring it into your awareness, look it in the face and release it, move on, and it often will give you a little bit of connection to the origin too. So if you've been carrying that fear for lifetimes, it allows you to release that from your timeline. If it's come down generally generationally, it allows you to clear that for your lineage, right, like there's, there's real beauty there.

Speaker 1: 29:10

But anyway, all of that to say, those blocks are just like a couple that I see all the time when somebody is looking at creating a life that they love, and so it feels a lot safer to go after the money win, to go after the superficial win, the, you know, the things that everybody else deems as being success. It's easier to strive for those because it's almost like a detachment. It's like there's like a yeah, there's a detachment. Right, there's an unattachment, there's a separation between you and the desire, because it's not like the deepest, strongest, you know, most visceral desire that you could possibly have, where it like activates your whole body and you feel it in your soul and you, just you want it, that level of ownership, that level of like. Oh, now it's personal. You know that desire is really personal.

Speaker 1: 30:07

Um, that can be scary, that can trigger a lot of you know, maybe not wanting to go all in because you, you don't want to be disappointed, or you know whatever else is to go all in because you don't want to be disappointed, or you know whatever else is going on in the undercurrents there. So that's where, if you feel like you've been striving, if you feel like you've been like pushing and striving and trying, and you know just sort of you're almost avoiding your true desires by placing your attention elsewhere, and by you know placing your attention elsewhere and by you know placing your focus elsewhere, um, it's, it's time, and that's my invitation to you, is it's time to come home to what it is that you really want, to the lifestyle that you really want, to what you want to be available for, and stop putting pressure on your business to be that for you, to you know, validate that for you, um, and start just choosing it, start just living it day in and day out, and then allow the money to flow to you through your business and through other avenues, to support you in that, as you go. But it's not. It's not.

Speaker 1: 31:22

The focus is not on the business. The business is meant to come in and support you in that. It's to support you in your soul purposes, to support you in your soul work, and that's it. So get clear on what you want, get clear on what you don't want and throw it out. Let yourself experiment, let yourself, let go of the things that aren't completely aligned for you right now it's 333 here and move forward, listening to your soul, connecting to your soul every day.

Speaker 1: 31:57

And, of course, like I said, if you need support with any of that, reach out, let me know. I do have space available for one-on-one mentorship right now, but that's what I've got for you today. I hope you have the most amazing week ahead and I will talk to you soon. Bye for now. Thank you for tuning in. If you enjoyed this podcast, it would mean the world if you'd take a moment to download a couple episodes and rate the show to help it reach more like-minded leaders. If you loved today's discussion and decide to share it, be sure to tag me on Instagram at Radiant Soul Coach to help expand the ripple effect of this podcast.